A Networking Fairy Tale Featuring Humpty Dumpty

Humpty Dumpty opened a new business selling walls. He found a retail space, spent a lot of money on inventory, and then threw the doors open one nice spring day.

Nobody came. He sat in the store and waited. Business was slow. He asked his neighbor, Miss Muffet if it was a bad neighborhood, but she didn't know because she had agoraphobia and never went outside. He asked his other neighbor, Jack Sprat (a physical trainer) what he should do. "Advertise," said Jack. But Humpty didn't have any money left.

Little Boy Blue told him to cold call, but Humpty didn't know how to craft a good message. The Old Lady who lived in the shoe down the street suggested direct mail, but Humpty didn't know where to get a list. Mary, Mary, the contrarian, told him to find a new target market, but Humpty didn't even know who was in his old target market.

Finally, one of the king's men told him about a networking event down at the castle that was being sponsored by the local Chamber of Commerce. Humpty hemmed and hawed, but finally decided that at the very least, he'd get something to eat and he could leave if it wasn't any good.

Humpty Dumpty had a great time! He met a marketing expert who could help him find low-cost advertising. He was introduced to a sales specialist who told him where to find cold-calling scripts. He found out that the Chamber had a seminar on direct mailing strategies. The Chamber Membership Director suggested some good books on guerilla marketing and then invited him to become a member.

Humpty joined the Chamber and all summer long he enjoyed excellent networking events, learned a great deal about running a small business, and saved money through the Chamber advertising discounts. He told all his friends that they should join the Chamber, too, and together they developed terrific, long-term mutally beneficial relationships with everyone in town.

And as September, October and November rolled by, Humpty counted up the profits and realized he'd had a great fall!