More on Motivating Yourself to Network

In thinking more about yesterday's post on motivating yourself, I have a couple more thoughts.

If you're still having a hard time getting yourself to go to a networking event or participating in any kind of deliberate network building activities, you've got to find more compelling reasons to do the work.

• Make a list of every possible benefit. Sit down with a pen and paper and write down every possible benefit, advantage, and prospect you would want to gain from participating in networking. Get detailed. Get imaginative. They may or may not be realistic, but they might be possible.

For example, networking might help you:

• Get a new client
• Build your reputation
• Find an amazing dentist/chiropractor/printer/drycleaner, etc.
• Remind someone to send you a referral
• Make you a new friend
• Find an old friend
• Give someone help that saves them a lot of trouble
• Impress your boss with something you learn
• Meet the love of your life
• Help you find a home for the stray cat who showed up on your porch
• Find a luncheon group who wants you as a speaker

Except for meeting the love of my life (which I managed on my own, thank you), networking has accomplished all of these things for me and more. But I do know of a couple who has been married 20 years after meeting at a Clovis Chamber event. So they are all possible.

Are any of these appealing to you? Would any of these results be beneficial? Would they be worth the investment of an hour or two? Would accomplishing one of these make you find just a little bit of time and energy?

Getting Motivated to Network

I promised my newsletter subscribers that I would start talking about the challenges that they face in networking enough to achieve their goals.

One challenge that I've seen in several different forms is being motivated to network or having the desire to attend events.

This is a tough one because if you don't want to go, you will find many excellent and legitimate reasons to avoid networking events. There is so much to do, we're so busy doing so many things, that you could fill every hour with important work which will keep you away from networking.

You are not going to be successful at networking unless you want to do it. And yet you know networking is important to business success, so you sort of want to, but you just can't get motivated enough to quite make it to an event.

My friend Dr. IWannaWanna says it's not enough to "want to" do something, but you have to "want to, want to." I take it as meaning that we all "want to" do stuff like be successful, have a lot of money, etc. but that's not enough. We have to "want to" take some actual action to make these things happen. Dr. IWannaWanna has a very good point. What's funny is that one of the things he doesn't wanna do is network! And I don't think I could talk circles around him fast enough to convince him.

But I don't have to convince him. I don't even have to convince you. You have to do it. So how do you make yourself want to network? I have several methods of convincing myself to do things:

• Get to the root reason why. Networking for the sake of networking isn't going to be very inspiring unless you already love it. Networking because your boss told you to isn't going to make you like it either. But, do you networking because you want to grow your business, because you have a young family you want to support? Providing for your children is a compelling reason.
• Trick yourself. This is how I get in a lot of exercise. I tell myself, "just five minutes and then you can quit." By that time I've gotten warmed up and feel like doing a little more. Tell yourself, "I'll just talk to one person and then I'll leave." Next thing you know, they're cleaning up around you.
• Reward yourself. Allow yourself to stop at and see your favorite barista if you go. Let yourself come to work 30 minutes late because you networked late. Treat yourself in some way for putting in the effort.
• Team up with a friend. Your friend will be counting on you to meet them there. And, if your friend is shy or introverted, you'll be helping them out by being there to introduce them to people. Having someone else involved keeps you accountable.
• Have a specific goal or reason. Just going for the sake of attending isn't going to be as appealing as "looking for a new supplier" or "finding out who's renting the new commercial space."
  
• Get results and keep track of them. Nothing is more motivating than when you start to see the fruits of your labors. And, keep track of your results because its easy to forget them when the days get long and the memory of the great connections gets pushed aside by your busy days.

Is this helpful? Do you have a truly compelling reason to network? Do you have a plan? Are you bringing in outside resources to help yourself?

Tell me about your tricks and what works for you.

Learning from Brian Clark's Authority Rules

I downloaded a copy of Brian Clark's free ebook Authority Rules (found out about it from Twitter, of course). Very interesting and definitely worth the little bit of reading time it will take to work through this pithy and to-the-point report. It's written in the style of Seth Godin; i.e., it's short but if you work through everything in it, you've got a lot of studying and work to do.

But I had to laugh, because an experience I had today clearly illustrated one of Brian's key points. On page 7 he says

What other people say about you is more important than what you say about yourself.

Tomorrow, the Clovis Chamber Seminar Series will be a hands-on session to set up Twitter accounts for our members. We sent an email out to our members reminding them of the event. One of the emails we got back was from someone who definitely does their homework.

I was listed as the presenter. He went to Twitter and did a search on my name. But all the results he got for "Beth Bridges" were for people who had fewer than 11 followers. I'm thinking he was pretty perplexed at this point wondering why the Chamber seminar was being run by someone who either he couldn't find on Twitter or who had only a few followers.

He sent an email to our Communications Director pointing this out. Of course, she sent the email to me. I thought it was funny, but I appreciated his diligence in wanting to know whether or not I had the authority to be presenting the seminar.

Here's where this blog ties in with Brian Clark's report and the specific quote written above. Instead of sending an email back to the inquirer protesting that I was indeed someone with a decent amount of followers, I asked my friends to reassure the gentleman that, indeed, I did know a few things about Twitter and that I was qualified to teach the seminar. Definitely an attempt (successful, I think) to assure him of my authority by asking other people to confirm it, not just me saying it.

It all worked out very well because one friend pointed out the fallability of Twitter's search function and I admitted that I had made an error in my profile which made it harder for a search to find me. And, my new friend is going to help out with the seminar tomorrow, too.

Several Random Thoughts & Experiences

Just a few unrelated thoughts and topics.

A Phenomenon that I'm Curious About

Over the last several weeks I've spoken to three different Rotary Clubs. Whenever (and wherever) I speak, I always ask audience members to fill out a very quick and simple three-question survey. I always ask the same way, "Please take just a minute. It's completely anonymous and helps me learn more about networking and improve my presentations."

When I speak to the Central Valley Professionals job club, every person fills it out. When I spoke to real estate agents at Newton & Sons in Dinuba and London Properties in Clovis, every one of them fill it out. But for the Rotary Clubs, fewer than 20% fill out the form.

I truly wonder why? Is there a better way to present it to them? Any ideas for how I can get a better response?

Rediscovering Old Friends

You never know when you're going to run into someone. At London Properties this morning, I started my presentation and finally realized why the gentleman sitting in the front looked so familiar. I had worked for him nearly 20 years ago in my first job out of college. It was an excellent learning experience and I admired the business that he and his partner had built. We caught up just briefly and I'm glad to learn that he's got a great life. And, I realized who he reminds me of (or who reminds me of him); Dave Foley from Kids in the Hall and NewsRadio.

Losing Old Friends

On a sad note. This weekend, long-term active Chamber member Jim Wilson of J&E Business Services passed away unexpectedly. Jim had this gravelly voice that sounded - if you didn't know him - as if he was angry. But he was one of the most even-tempered, straight-forward, no-nonsense people I knew. He was very tall and would stand close and talk right down to me, which I found intimidating until I met his wife. She's shorter than I am, so he must have been used to talking with her! Jim had a guant, Clint Eastwood look until he smiled with a surprisingly boyish grin.

We'll sure miss you Jim.